How to Make Your Online Dating Profile More Swipe- able. Online dating is, for lack of a better phrase, freaking exhausting. I’d be lying if I said I enjoyed using Tinder, Bumble, and the like, but dating in this modern age without them is almost unheard of. I’ve heard several people describe their dating- app experience as “video game like,” which is kind of disheartening, considering that there are actual humans attached to the videos on the screen. But it’s not all bad. Several people I know, myself included, have had positive experiences and healthy relationships as a result of online dating, and you can too. First though, you have to get the swipes.
Basically, if you have to play this stupid video game, you might as well play it well, and below are a few of the ways you can make your profile a little more swipe- able. When I moved out from the apartment I shared with my husband, two dogs, and a cat, it hurt real. First impressions are key no matter what the format, and if people can’t tell what you look like, their impression isn’t going to be a good one. It may seem a bit shallow to stress this heavily, but keep in mind we’re dealing with dating apps that reduce a person down to a few photos and hopefully witty sentences, so the photos are important. At the very least, you need one current- ish photo that clearly shows your face—at a real, non- My. Space angle—and a full- body shot (preferably fully clothed). Keep The Group Shots to a Minimum. Unless your group is doing something exceptionally cool, there is really no benefit to posting the group photo. Suggest a fun date as your conversation opener.) Photos with a lot of people in them are at best confusing, especially if you have a homogeneous- looking friend group and, at worst, your potential date could find one of your friends more attractive, which is awkward for everyone. Also this shouldn’t have to be said, but don’t use photos of you and your ex. Like, it’s great that you’re friends and all—don’t complain about them or anything on a first date—but photos of old lovers aren’t exactly an aphrodisiac. That Better Be Your Damn Dog“Cute dog!,” “He’s not mine,” is my least favorite type of Tinder convo ever, which is impressive, considering the veritable buffet of horror that is Tinder conversations. If you are going to exploit the cuteness of a creature to get matches, you better be able to deliver said cuteness. For the Love of All That is Good, Please State If You’re Poly. Look, nothing against those in open relationships—I myself am in one—but no one likes a surprise poly situation. Though polyamory is becoming more and more popular, it’s not for everyone, and it can be a real bummer to find out this person you’re really clicking with has a partner you were not expecting. I was falling in love with the woman with whom I was having a transatlantic fling when she told me. Bumble especially is also heavily populated with dead fish, and there are only so many photos of giant dead fish I can look at without my eyes glazing over (in a manner that is very similar to that of a dead fish). Photos of you engaging in your favorite activities are fine, but keep it to one pic per activity, and be aware that you might have the same preferred past time as your competition, and the whole goal here is to stand out. If you only swipe on the opposite gender, and thus cannot see the type of photos other men or women or posting, I suggest asking a friend who dates your gender the most common photos they encounter. I can only speak for the PNW, but I bet dead fish are popular everywhere. Switching to Linux delivers many benefits for users. From a more stable system to a vast selection of good quality open source software, you’re onto a winner. The top VPN software tested and reviewed by a qualified computer scientist. Don’t Write a Novel. The whole point of going on dates is getting to know each other and, while it’s nice to have some common talking points going in, a laundry list of every TV show, band, movie, and book you like is tedious, and it could work against you. For example, if a potential match lists one of your least favorite bands as one of their top 1. Basically, keep it short—only list one or two major interests, and include one joke at the most.
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August 2017
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